Habits of the Robot Masters!
by Sh1ft1ng Sands
Summary: Excuse the short chapters. Bass and I, well...mostly me, try to make a documentary about the Robot masters. Rated for my colorful language.
1. Intro

Yo! Wizard of Pie here! And with the fic that will be written until I get ideas for my other story. So without further bullcrap intros, I give you…Habits of the Robot Masters!

Disclaimer: I don't own Megaman. If I did, Bass would be kicking Megaman's ass all over the floor. R&R! Fic will be in my POV.

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"Jesus Christ in a banana. I'm bored." I said to myself on a rainy, post-summer day. I sat on a rather comfy recliner, surfing the internet on my laptop. I grabbed my box of Pocky and wolfed down another one. It tasted weird, but I brushed it off. As I was surfing, I did not notice a weird portal on my right open up. Again, I didn't notice a black robot with a helmet that had fins on it step out.

"Who are you?" The robot asked. No answer.

The robot got impatient. "Did I make my self clear? Who are you?" Still no answer.

"GOD DAMNIT! WHAT THE HELL IS SO IMPORTANT THAT YOU…" It walked over and saw what I was doing.

"What are you doing?" It asked.

"Playing Final Fantasy 1." I replied.

"Starting out?"

"No, I'm up to the Elf place."

"Oh."

Silence…then, "HOLY CHRIST ON A CAMPFIRE! YOU'RE BASS!"

"Took you long enough, genius. Now, who are you?"

"Uh….I'm Robert. But I prefer Rob. How did you get here?"

"Portal. Dr. Wily was intending to make one so that it would transport me into Megaman's home."

"And let me guess. The overly clichéd, 'Coordinates get fucked up and transport subject elsewhere.'"

"How'd you know that?"

"The internet teaches you these things."

Awkward silence…

"So…Can I go with you?" I asked.

"W-what!"

"You heard me. I wanna see what your world is like."

"I dunno. Normally, I'm not this nice to humans at all. Besides, Dr. Wily would not like the idea of me bringing a human back."

"What would you say if I could try to get you a fair fight, no interruptions, with Megaman?"

"…Fine…Just, step through before I change my mind."

I saved my game and shut down my laptop. I didn't bother leaving a note. Like my parents would care anyways. I placed it on the left arm of the recliner, got up, and walked into the portal, with Bass walking in afterwards. As the warp commenced,

"Whoa. Trippy." I said.

"Yeah. I was like that when I got transported to your home." Bass said.

After the arrival, "Welcome back Bass…HEY! What's this!" Yelled Dr. Wily.

"I'm not Bass." I said, immeadiately after, Bass stepped out. "But he is."

"Bass! Who is this?"

"Dr. Wily, this human…"

"I have a name, dipshit!" I said, rather irritated.

"Shut the hell up. This human named Robert, decided to come with me."

Dr. Wily sighed, then said, "Fine, but make sure he doesn't cause any trouble."

"Who am I? His caretaker?" Bass shouted.

"For now, until he proves he's not in league with Megaman."

"Urgh…Fine. Come on, I'll find you a room to stay in."

"Fine." And with that Bass led me out of Dr. Wily's sight and took me to the room I was to stay in.

"Here. You'll be staying in Tenguman's room." Bass said.

"Bass! Who the hell is this!" Shouted Tenguman.

"This, is Rob. He will be staying in your room. Should any harm come to him, I'll make your life a living hell. Am I clear?"

"Why do you care about this human so much anyways, Bass?"

"Wily left me in charge of him."

"And what the hell would you do to me if I, quote, 'Let any harm come to him?" Bass then fired a shot dangerously close to Tenguman's head.

"The next shot won't miss. Am I clear now?"

"Y-yes Bass…"

"Good. Rob, (Can't believe I'm saying this…) Make yourself comfortable."

"Thanks Bass." And with that, Bass left.

Silence for about a minute, then,

"So…where do I sleep?" I asked.

"There's an extra bed in the closet."

"Thanks."

A few hours later, and much laughter from Tenguman…

"Fucking hell. You could've helped!"

"Yeah, but then, where would the fun be in that?" I shook with rage, then calmed down. "Fine. Just let me freakin' sleep."

"Dude! It's 7 P.M!"

"And I wanna sleep." I said, yawned then collapsed and fell asleep.

"Weird...Oh well, Time to go find Metal Man."

Before I fell into deep sleep, I thought, "I feel like making a documentary."

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(That was fun. Now, R&R!)


	2. In which a sock earns cussing

Sorry about the late update. I was busy…

Every single Classic, X series, Zero series, EXE, and Legends character except Forte.EXE: Being too lazy to give a $#+ about this fic!

Me: AY! (summons SunMoon P.A and Forte.EXE)

Forte.EXE: This will be fun. (Prepares Hells Rolling)

Every single Classic, X series, Zero series, EXE, and Legends character except Forte.EXE: Meep!

* * *

The next day…

"Where the F#k is my god D$m sock!" I shouted.

"It's on your foot." Tenguman said, while his ears were ringing from the, ahem, colorful language.

"Oh. I knew that." I said.

"Sure you did." Tenguman said, sentence dripping with sarcasm.

"Ah shut up. Wait a tic. If I'm here, then that means, HOLYSHITICANGETMEGAMAN'SAUTOGRAPH!" I said, sounding like a giddy schoolgirl on crack. Really strong crack.

"Why would you want to do that? You know he's a Light bot, and Dr. Wily hates Light bots." Tenguman said.

"Yeah, but, I can get Forte a fair fight with him." I bragged.

"And if that doesn't work, I'll take the pipe approach!" I said with dark fire in the backround.

"And what exactly is the pipe approach?" Tenguman asked.

"…You don't want to know." I said while somehow detaching a pipe.

"Whatever. Just don't get blasted." Tenguman said while walking off.

"Up yours, birdie." I said. Tenguman froze.

"What. Did. You. JUST. SAY!" Teguman yelled, anger rising.

"I said, Up yours, Birdie. Wanna make something of it?" I countered, anger rising as well. Bass conveniently walked by.

"What the hell? Rob, clearly you're outmatched, so here, have something I ripped out of a Sniper Joe and had Wily modify so that it can charge and copy weapons because of a random urge."

"…Bass…I can handle this with just a pipe." I said clutching the pipe tightly.

"Fine, I'll go see if Heat Man wants to burn this. Have fun, ladies."

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Meanwhile, somewhere deserted lay a lone Sniper Joe. "H…Hello…? Can…Can someone help me?...Please?"

* * *

Back at Wily's Fortress…

* * *

"AH JESUS! I'M SORRY!" I yelled, running out of the fortress and towards Dr. Lights home.

"YOU D#M WELL BETTER BE!" Tenguman shouted, making the occasional swoop.

"HOLYSHITHOLYSHITHOLYSHIT!" I yelled, screeching to a halt at Dr. Light's door and banging on it repeadedly. Mega Man answered the door and was greeted with furious hits to the head.

"Ow! Hey! Cut it out!" Mega Man said, trying to make me stop.

"Please let me in! I've got a robot master chasing me! And I'll explain later!" I said, panicking.

"Fine, I'll deal with it." Mega Man said, forming his armor.

"By the way, It's Tenguman."

"Grand."

One fight later…

"So let me get this straight. You came here from a warp machine Dr.Wily built, came back with Bass, Spent the night, cussed your head off over a sock, pissed Tenguman off, and ran here. Is that correct?" Mega Man asked.

"Yes. Now, uh, two things. One, Can I stay here for the night until Tenguman cools off? And two, Well, I'll tell you that later."

"One, yes. I'll let Dr. Light know. Two, why not now?"

"Trust me, it's for the best." I said.

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Well, I leave you with a cliff hanger. Once again, I don't own Mega Man. Please review! Flames will be greeted by Meteor Red Sun.

Next chapter will be about my stay at the Light house. HA! Get it? Light house?...You people are no fun.


	3. In which a table induces dizziness

This update brought to you by YouTube, Maple Story, Mortal Kombat: Deception, The Megaman X series, Calligraphy, School, Halloween, Pictures, Megaman ZX, The Pokemon series, And November in all its Thanksgiving-like goodness. On with the fic! Sorry this is late…

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The day with the Light's is as follows. 

"Thanks for the save back there, Megaman." I said, breathing out a sigh of relief.

"Don't mention it. And please, call me Rock." Meg-er, Rock said.

"Ok, now, I bet you're wondering how I got here." I said.

"That would be a safe assumption. Let me go get Roll, Blues, and Dr. Light." Rock said, walking off to fetch the other two robots and their creator. I sat down on their couch, holding my forehead with my left hand and sighing again.

"How in the high hells of Hades did I get into this mess?" I asked myself.

"I don't know, but start explaining." A voice from behind me said. I shouted, and reflexively flew forward…smacking into the table and knocking myself unconscious. Ow…when I came to, the Light family was surrounding me.

"Whoa…Damn, did anyone get the license number of that semi?" I asked, a little bit groggy from the hit.

"No, but you did hit the table and fall unconscious for three hours." The same voice from before said. It turned out to belong to Blues, also known as Protoman, or even Break Man. But I'm sure if you called him that, you'd get a face full of plasma.

"Well, damn. Am I bleeding?" I asked.

The girl robot answered, "Well, you were, but I did stop the bleeding." The robot, more known as Roll, answered.

"Wow. What time is it?" I asked. A clock was pushed into my face by Rock. I leaned back and grabbed the clock. It read, 12:00 PM, yo! I stared at the clock, then shook my head for a quick half-second.

"Okay…that answers one question…" I muttered.

"And I have one." Dr. Light said.

"Shoot."

"How did you get here?" Dr. Light asked.

"Well…(A/N: Cue flashback!) I was minding my own business at my home in 2006, when a portal opened and Bass stepped out. After a bit of conversation, I went with him to Dr. Wily's laboratory. There, Bass was questioned a bit, and I was given a room to stay for the night. Unfrotunately, it was Tenguman's room. Basically, the next day, we got into a verbal fight, and it ended with me high-tailin' it here." I re-capped.

"I see. Well, we can let you stay here for today." Dr. Light said.

"That would be nice. Now uh, can you all back up a bit so I can get up?" I asked. To make a long story short, they did, and I got up.

"Much better. Now, I hate to be a bastard, but, could one of you give me a tour of this city, please?" I asked.

Much to my surprise, Auto said, "I will."

"Well, wasn't expecting that, but what the hell." I said, with that, Auto and I left to tour the city, well, me actually. Now, I am damn sure that you don't want to listen to this, so I'll make this, quick. Toured the city and came back at 2:00. Watched TV with Rock, Roll, and Blues until dinner, which was probably the best I ever had. After that, conversed with Blues until 7:00, Got everyone's autograph, talked with Rock until 9:00, played with Rush a bit, watched a bit of TV until 10:00, was given the couch to sleep on. And so ends the day…What? My dream?...Alright, I'll spill. Ever played one of the Worms games before? Well, Imagine a one-sided game. There. Now go away. I want to sleep.

* * *

Fefnir: Finally! He updates! 

W.O.P.: (uses a Homing pigeon) STFU!

Fefnir: CHRIST MY EYES!

W.O.P.: Disclaimer time! Megaman, Bass, and the other characters belong to Capcom. The Worms games belong to Team17. I belong to myself.

Fefnir: WHY AM I ALLOWED TO LIVE?!

W.O.P.: (puts on a red headband) Excuse me. Oh, and I'm sorry if this chapter doesn't have any humor. I blew a funny fuse.

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Preview: I go back to Dr. Wily's fortress and start getting the idea for a documentary. Thought I had scrapped the idea huh? Wrong! Till then, This is Wizard of Pie and Fefnir, signing off. 


End file.
